Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
