I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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