you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
