I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
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