I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
