There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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