well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Randomize
