people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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