so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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