Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize
