just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I think we might need a safe word for this...
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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