can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
