his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
