guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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