Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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