yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Randomize
