Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Randomize
