So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Randomize
