There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
