Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
it glows. i had to have it.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
