He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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