This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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