Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
