2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
