Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Randomize