I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
