Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Randomize