And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
