i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
they call him Oral-B. enough said
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
