I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize