You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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