Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
