Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
