So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
