maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
she pinky promised me she was 18
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
