you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
