hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
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