let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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