I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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