If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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