im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
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