some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
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