Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Randomize
