Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
