You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize
