my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Randomize
