naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
