you win again, gameday.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
