And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
My ATM looks so different sober.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
