i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
