I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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